Almost Anger

Write about anger you said

You who are always 

Almost my lover

Almost aroused by an image

On your Laptop

Almost a singer in nightclubs

Of your dark moods

Almost a man almost

Almost wanting me

Almost wanting me to leave you

As my emotions overflow and ebb

Almost like the sea

Flowing unlike my desire

That night we bathed ourselves

Almost together in a baptism

Of holy Beat holiness

Almost Ginsberg and Cassady

Almost a monkey and a pig 

In a house that was almost yours

The best I can muster my love is 

Almost Anger because Anger is 

Only possible when it is possible

To give you unadulterated joy

Jack 12-17-12

Milkyway Haiku

Stars blaze winter sky
White Milky Way shimmering
Shines like holy jizz

Orion

Orion

Will you be old friend the last
Name I recall as I stare at the dark
Ascending night in the winter sky
You were with me when my child's
Eye first looked for constellations
You have seen me through all the
Constellations of my life my loves
My one night one year one decade
Lifetime loves a phantasmagoria
Of couplings and sexual surrender
Of hands held and legs spread 
Embraces with fingers through my hair
Mine through theirs your sword piercing 
Consciousness in a cluster of
Mindfulness
In the outback sky of Australia
Before the glaciers of Patagonia
In Copenhagen and the black sands
Of Hawaii in the little round park
Where I climbed trees and waited for
The Milky Way to appear glistening
Sperm of Heaven filling the sky
Flowing to be shared 
With all the dazzling planets of my
Arching firmament


--Jack,  on the eve of the 2012 Solstice 

Come Faithful

Come Faithful

What did it count in your
Existential equation that orgasm
Porn inspired mouth fucking
Shoving your penis with fury
Until the sperm spurted into
Her throat until your jizz
Flowed right out of her nose
Did you bend and kiss her
Come glistening on her lips
Tasting yourself there hold her
In your sweat glistening arms
Console her laugh with her
Laugh at her facefull of come
Tell her you loved her not
Just her mouth or body
Loved her as you loved me
When you held my body
Stroked me ever so gently
And for the first time in your life
Made someone else come

Jack Jameson 11/21/12

Holiday

A Half moon shines midnight
Unevenly through the grove of oaks
Not yet bare holding on to autumn
The way we hold on to expectations
Of holiday cheer at the approach of
Winter Solstice and of all those special
Days we've invented for the pretense
Of warmth and transcendence.

--Jameson 11/20/12

November

Resplendence of November
Fading sunlight highlights
Gold and crimson treetops
As an unexplained mellowness
Transforms fatigue from last night's
Revelries and reveries
Into beatitude

From Whitman

Through me forbidden voices,
Voices of sexes and lusts, voices veiled and I remove the veil,
Voices indecent by me clarified and transfigured.
I do not press my fingers across my mouth,
I keep as delicate around the bowels as around the head and heart,
Copulation is no more rank to me than death is.
I believe in the flesh and the appetites,
Seeing, hearing, feeling, are miracles, and each part and tag of me is a miracle.
Divine am I inside and out, and I make holy whatever I touch or am touched from,
The scent of these armpits aroma finer than prayer,
This head more than churches, bibles, and all the creeds.
If I worship one thing more than another it shall be the spread of my own body, or any part of it....

Song of Myself

By Walt Whitman

http://www.daypoems.net/plainpoems/1900.html

Monju Bosatsu

Monju Bosatsu

In Asia the god of Wisdom is
Monju who brought to Japan
Buddhism and same sex love

Watching the blue blood in my
Vein course its way from my finger
Up my wrist to my arm I think

What wisdom has same sex love
Given me from those who have loved
My mind enough to hold my flesh

Easy enough when I shared youth
The swagger and vim the elan vital
When I married mind and body

Now yet attracted to myself my blood filled
Hand my loins my penis still erect I am
Loved by others for mind alone not flesh

What has a Buddhist deity to offer me
Bodhisattva will you reach out and hold me
As I have come to need or must I relinquish

All Desire even my own love of self
Let go of otherness let go of all the lovers
Who'd have my spirit alone until my breath

Is gone

Storm

How long the sea remains calm
The ocean breeze soothes and cools
Sunlight streams upon us on our beach
Our lives are joys of hours shared
The autumn moon shimmers over our 
Nights
We think we shall be like this forever

Unperceived the ripple begins
Clouds gather quietly darken
As we rest until the waves unresting grow
Until some word some meaningless gesture 
Mistook some glance or pulling away
Some leave-taking brings a rise
In heat as eddies swirl into the pressure

So suddenly grows the storm from peacefulness
We cannot see reality the turbulence the war
Rising in a tempest of emotion of fear
Panic as we fight to find its end only to be
Struck dumb and blown apart as if we never 
Were embraced secure in love
Forces of nature rip us asunder

An autumn storm awes us it leaves us cold
As unexpected damage and brutality unfold

Jack
10/28/12

Pepper Haiku

like cayenne pepper
dashes of  intimacy
nourish our friendship

Naked

Naked

How many nights have you and I wandered these hills
Steep streets that over time grew steeper for you
Talking in the beginning of our love of Neal 
Of Jack of Allen explicating for ourselves the underlying
Meanings of nakedness and trust
Until the dawn when we stripped and began knowing
Nakedness rather than philosophizing it

We partook of existential angst and the loneliness
Simone and Jean Paul knew but managed so well
We too brazenly compared ourselves to our heroes
And loved ourselves for it 
After our walks we championed us to our
Friends our respective worlds taking in plays about
Oscar Wilde and seeing exhibitions of Pablo and Egon 

We came home growing more intimate taking in our
Nakedness in ever deeper ways each day approaching
In a spiral of activities and nights out Leonard Cohen
Gigs and poetry and travel baring more than our bodies 
Our being our psyches our Tao our dreams our souls
Our  spirits our conscious and unconscious our energy
Our song

Until we like Ginsberg at a reading of Howl
Until you commanded and we took off our pants
Until sexuality gave way to something more
A nakedness of two humans merging for a moment
Of no expectations in an embrace that was as radiant
As the dawn we watched together over the ocean
Planet Stars crescent moon and sun aligned as we were

Was it not so were we truly no more than
An old man and a youth lost for a time in our
Own dreams thinking we could create our own 
Reality contrary to that of the society we inhabit
Contrary to our lusts and our limitations
Perhaps so yet whatever that nakedness was
It will continue to connect us no less 

Jack Jameson 10/25/12

Haiku Choke

Mouthing loud complaint
Epileptic squirrel chokes 
As I eat ripe pear

Going

Going

The rain pouring down today
Conjures Hiroshige's bridge
Straight hard lines of water
Bearing down on villagers crossing
Burdened with their stuff of life

What bridge shall I cross
In the spring in Japan
A Zen bridge to my final years
Bridge to caring or indifference
To the vicissitudes of existence

The water washes my memory
Those violent passions past drown
In the rain that falls on my mind
Massaging me like the face of my
Lover pressed against my chest

So many paths pictured woodcuts
Offer me a Tao of my own
For now as I imagine passing
Through forests along lakes
With Shinto shrines to ancestors 

There the spirit world the so-called
Hallucinations of Shamans no less
Perceptions than mine of this rain soaked
Day as I wait out the time to my
Next embrace to my next journey

Jack
10-1-12

Intangible

Intangible

Always it has struck me as so
That time and space are not
Real though they be mindful constructs
Of our imagination as our
Perception is all there is I think
So that when I recall my loves
Lost in the recesses of unreality
Like almost remembered dreams
They exist like mist from the sea
Are no less than robed and sandaled
Genderless people of the past
Walking the streets of Athens and Nara
No less the music of Faure and Satie no less
The Haiku of Dogen and Basho
Not lost in the bulldozing that the contemporary
World does to nature and to humanity
As greed and profit and progress so called
Sweep away the sweet and the sweetbitter
In the quest for material success and
Work that is void of meaning
Like the empty spaces in the ruins
Of the Parthenon the empty space of
Shinto shrines
Time and space are hard illusions
The loves intangible that penetrated us 
Are not 

My Pagan Opinion

My Pagan Opinion

Humans have more to learn in nature
Than nature has to fear in us
There are better ways to get hot
Than tail pipe exhaust and raping the land
There are tribes where there is no war
And individuals relieve tension and fighting
By touch
Touch that gets them warm and hot
Touch that goes to the genitals
Generating warmth that glistens
Bonobo touch in a world of such equality
Such absence of discrimination and exclusivity
Pan would blush with joy and play
His pipes

Lovers

Lovers

You said it years ago "Lovers"
We are lovers like no others
Though we care for each other
Though we are friends
Though we have touched each other
There
With love no one could question
Ours is abnormal
As we like it
Not traditional not the result of mere
Desire
We are lovers for the touch we have
Touch that is weird strange and uneasy
Reinforcing a deeper probe
We fuck each other's mind
We go into each other by another
Route
We sealed our pact the night
You quietly pulled me to you
Taste of whiskey
And kissed me 

Jack 8/12/12

Where Next

Where Next

Much is finished much is yet to begin

The mountain road so lost in fog

Soaked with rain lit by lightning

Became calm in the sunlight as we

Climbed upward to a vista from which

Nothing was clear except distance

A short-lived butterfly its wings spanned

With gold and black patterns stopped

To sip nectar on its path from Far North

To Mexico and beyond how could it go

Such distance in its short life How could I

Go from this mountain trail  to another

Continent crossing more oceans

Going not knowing my identity

Seeking contact with others who 

Give me a fuller sense of humanity

Because ever the empath I absorb distance

Making myself dissolve in an embrace

What Reason tells me lies before

Is seldom so as on each alien shore

Letting go of expectation yields a new face

Heart

Heart

My heart's not weak at all

It is a hard thing small

Blood goes in and blood out

While all the heart ache 

Is merely more memory

This betrayal that death

You may call it doubt

I say with each sad breath

With each love that turns fake

My comfort comes from nothing

As surely mine as no one ever

Was

Haiku

OK Alfred black

Fiddler crab on lava rock

Leaving us tongue claw

Jack
For AC 7/12

Snot

Snot

It is a halcyon morning

Sunlight slants the line of oaks

Touch of breeze stirs my feelings

Of others long gone touching me

Their spirits bring a sneeze

As ancient Athenians predicted

A sneeze of sinus congestion

And when I lift my white handkerchief

To blow my nose the scent of coffee

From Papua New Guinea fills

My senses taking me to the Pacific

Where a Polynesian once made me come